My life need be described in only one single word: stuck. I've typed it so much, that it no longer looks like a real word to my brain.
I am writing because it is the only part of my life that I can really move forward. The rest of me remains stuck to this same spot that I've been in for the last year, and I think it is starting to mess with my brain a little bit.
I am trying so hard to make some sort of giant leap, but I keep being held back by some stupid obstacle. I want desperately to just make one jump...just one...but it feels so impossible. There is only so much time before I start taking drastic measures, but if this continues for any longer--if I am still here in the same spot at the end of the month--I will be forced to take those measures. It chills me to realize that I'll be throwing my money down a black hole, but, ironically, the only way I can move forward at this point is to dig my hole way deeper--aka: take out a high risk loan.
Ah, the irony. I will be stuck in paying off a loan that will never go down, in order to pay for the things I need to move forward...yet...I'll be putting myself in even more depth and ultimately moving back.
It's so confusing. x_x
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