This is my pitch-in-progress. A nice agent lady named Jessica is allowing people who read her blog to comment with their pitches, in which she'll then pick at random pitches that she will critique.
I decided to go ahead and give it a try. I hope she picks mine. :X
Here it is:
Fifteen year old Kitty Hawkins, daughter to London's most affluent widow, has a secret: she can talk to ghosts. On the morning of March 19th, 1743, England buzzes with the news of Lord William John Brinsley's sudden suicide, but only Kitty knows that Lord Brinsley was murdered: he told her. Driven by a persistent spirit and compassion for his now disgraced family, Kitty becomes devoted to exposing the crafty criminal; however, what first appeared to be a simple quest of vengeance soon thrusts Kitty right into the middle of a terrible conspiracy, orchestrated by one of the most ancient sects of English society. Now, Kitty must utilize the only two tools she has: men's clothing and her disgraceful unladylike intelligence, to uncover and expose this sinister plot before it destroys Lord Brinsley's family, her, and all of [Great Britain]. However, there is only one major complication: she must protect her secret, or else she just may find herself stranded on the wrong side of one of London's infamous witch hunts.
KITTY HAWKINS AND A FIST OF FOX FIRE is a Young Adult novel finished at 80k words.
No, it is not finished and yes, I have no idea if it will actually turn out to be 80k words. I just took an educated guess. I consider this my mock pitch--something that I would send IF my manuscript were complete.
Looking at it after I posted it, there are already things I want to change--namely the structure of the first sentence. However, my changes are only technical, so I'm going to go ahead and not change a thing and just see what Agent Jessica Lady has to say if I get picked. :X
I tried to make it "hook." I have no idea if it does that. So, my question to all of you: Does this pitch make the story sound even remotely interesting? If you liked ghost stories and history and mysteries, would you pick this up?
My changes. Disregard this--just for my reference.
Fifteen year old Kitty Hawkins, daughter to London's most affluent widow, has a secret: she can talk to ghosts. On the morning of March 19th, 1743, all of England buzzes with the news of Lord William John Brinsley's sudden suicide; only Kitty knows that the death was actually a murder, because the Lord Brinsley himself told her. Driven by a persistent spirit and compassion for his now disgraced family, Kitty becomes devoted to hunting and exposing the mysterious killer; however, what first appeared to be a simple quest of vengeance soon thrusts Kitty right into the middle of a terrible conspiracy, orchestrated by one of the most ancient sects of English society. Now, Kitty must utilize the only two tools she has: men's clothing and her disgracefully unladylike intelligence, to uncover and expose this sinister plot before it destroys Lord Brinsley's family, her, and all of [Great Britain]. However, there is only one major complication: she must protect her secret, or else she just may find herself stranded on the wrong side of an infamous London witch hunt.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Hmm...
I have a feeling this manuscript is going to turn out a bit longer than I had originally planned. :X
Monday, December 15, 2008
The puzzle pieces fit!
I went back to work today. No more vacation. =(
I did a lot of writing over vacation, and I ended up nixing a lot of it too. In fact, I completely erased two entire scenes from the manuscript. I had struggled with making these scenes coherent and making them fit, but I found that they were just too draggy and not very interesting. I was upset, but as soon as I deleted them, I found that I had a whole new flood of ideas to fill in those blank pages.
Which is why I am happy to announce that the first two chapters are almost done. =D And when I say almost done, I mean that they are almost done. Polished. Once I finish polishing them, I won't have to touch them or rearrange them or change them again (until a few months later when I pull this manuscript back out to go over it before sending it off). I am just really excited about how these two chapters have evolved. I feel so much more creative energy now that I was able to rid myself of the parts of the manuscript that were weighting it down unnecessarily.
I even introduced a new character in the first chapter who I am already loving. I had so much trouble figuring out where I would sequence everything. I don't plan my writing out at all--I just write. I don't spend months figuring out a time line and an outline (I tried that once--it did not work). I just go with it. This new character creation was not planned. It just happened. This means that I tend to have trouble sequencing things, because I write them in parts, rather than in order. Nixing those two scenes really really really helped all the puzzle pieces fall nicely into place.
I was just so excited about it that I had to put it on the blog. Yay me!
I did a lot of writing over vacation, and I ended up nixing a lot of it too. In fact, I completely erased two entire scenes from the manuscript. I had struggled with making these scenes coherent and making them fit, but I found that they were just too draggy and not very interesting. I was upset, but as soon as I deleted them, I found that I had a whole new flood of ideas to fill in those blank pages.
Which is why I am happy to announce that the first two chapters are almost done. =D And when I say almost done, I mean that they are almost done. Polished. Once I finish polishing them, I won't have to touch them or rearrange them or change them again (until a few months later when I pull this manuscript back out to go over it before sending it off). I am just really excited about how these two chapters have evolved. I feel so much more creative energy now that I was able to rid myself of the parts of the manuscript that were weighting it down unnecessarily.
I even introduced a new character in the first chapter who I am already loving. I had so much trouble figuring out where I would sequence everything. I don't plan my writing out at all--I just write. I don't spend months figuring out a time line and an outline (I tried that once--it did not work). I just go with it. This new character creation was not planned. It just happened. This means that I tend to have trouble sequencing things, because I write them in parts, rather than in order. Nixing those two scenes really really really helped all the puzzle pieces fall nicely into place.
I was just so excited about it that I had to put it on the blog. Yay me!
Friday, December 12, 2008
Bottomless closets, Really Pretty Paper, and terror-inducing Credit Scores...
Today has been quite productive, up until now. I ventured into the unknown (aka: my closet) this morning, armed with several industrial-sized trash bags and a plastic fork (for protection--you never know what you can find in the unknown). I ended up filling two gigantic trash bags with at least three tons of old clothes, some pieces dating as far back as middle school. A lot of it consisted of over-sized shirts that I had used as pj-tops for the past five years. It was not difficult parting with them--they needed to go. Much amusement was had over the little signatures and scribbles I found adorning several of my old uniform tops, containing such sentiments as "Cool beanz!" and "Call me!" Of course, I knew that those who were brave enough to scrawl their phone numbers (messily, in the hopes that maybe I wouldn't be able to read them, and thus not call) had been secretly reminding themselves to Not Pick Up The Phone For the First Week of Summer NO MATTER WHAT. Teehee.
So now I have two bulging bags ready to go to Goodwill. I figured this was the best time to do that, what with the Christmas Spirit and all. I can't imagine who would want to wear my horrendously out-dated attire to begin with, but it does feel nice to be donating something nonetheless.
I also have a bag up there full of trash. I always feel wonderfully productive when I gut my room of at least nine pounds of utter crap. Lastly, but not least, I just have to vacuum it up. (For those who were wondering: no, I did not end up needing to use the fork, after all. Thank-goodness--I don't think I'm a very good forkswoman to begin with).
To continue with my theme of unknown exploration, I decided to attempt wrapping my boyfriend's presents. Let it be known that last year, I employed my siblings to do the wrapping for me. This year (because, as you will learn from reading this blog, I am terribly cheap), I swung by the $1 store and picked up some dollar paper with little snowman dancing around a winter wonderlandscape. That night, Kevin kicked me from the room so he could wrap my presents. He then let me "shake" one of them, and to my utter and complete horror, it was wrapped in Really Pretty Paper with Really Fancy Ribbon and a Custom Bow. Let me remind you that this was only ONE of the gifts.
So, needless to say, when I met up with the friends yesterday to finish Xmas shopping, I went to the nearest craft store and bought nice paper and pretty ribbon so that I would not be shown up by--of all people--a MALE.
Long story short, the wrapping leaves much to be desired, but it does cut a pretty picture with the ribbon. Unfortunately, I just couldn't get the bow right, so I shoe-knotted it. I feel somewhat ashamed, as Kevin and I both worked at the same arts and crafts store, and somehow he managed to learn how to create a decent bow whereas I did not. Now, I just have to finish the other gifts I got him, and then stuff his stocking, and I'm done. =D Yay!
Finally, I decided to take one more adventure into the unknown, and am now regretting it. Haha. This was the most terrifying thing I've had to do all day today, and no amount of plastic forks could protect me from what I was about to face...
My credit report.
And oh noes, is it BAAAAAD. But! It is fixable! I don't have very much left at all to pay off on my student loans, and SCAD should be getting taken care of by January (I hope). There is also a little bit on there from a credit card I got a while ago, but it is much lower than I thought (well--I originally thought that it had been paid off completely, haha) and if I do really owe that much (I'm going to double check first), than I can pay it off right away. I will shed a tear over the fact that my savings account won't reach the projected "end-of-year" balance, BUT, if it means raising my credit score, than I guess it will be worth it. SIGH.
My score really wouldn't be this bad if it weren't for the things that happened which caused my parents to become terribly behind on my school payments. =( It does make me sad, because some of it was really out of my control. My parents were paying for school, like some parents do for their kids, and I was naturally under the impression that that was how it would be...but it did not turn out that way (owing to circumstances beyond their control).
What it taught me was that I just cannot depend on anyone anymore when it comes to money. Period. Hence, why I sock away $100 every week out of my weekly paycheck to a savings account that I never touch except for emergencies (the credit card would constitute as an emergency--a "saving-my-credit-score" emergency).
And that is that. It isn't ALL bad. I do have a job, and I do get really nice benefits, so I can't complain too much.
My manuscript is being fed lots of high fructose corn syrup and fats; it's a skeleton right now, and I need to beef it up a bit.
More on that later. I've written too much as it is.
So now I have two bulging bags ready to go to Goodwill. I figured this was the best time to do that, what with the Christmas Spirit and all. I can't imagine who would want to wear my horrendously out-dated attire to begin with, but it does feel nice to be donating something nonetheless.
I also have a bag up there full of trash. I always feel wonderfully productive when I gut my room of at least nine pounds of utter crap. Lastly, but not least, I just have to vacuum it up. (For those who were wondering: no, I did not end up needing to use the fork, after all. Thank-goodness--I don't think I'm a very good forkswoman to begin with).
To continue with my theme of unknown exploration, I decided to attempt wrapping my boyfriend's presents. Let it be known that last year, I employed my siblings to do the wrapping for me. This year (because, as you will learn from reading this blog, I am terribly cheap), I swung by the $1 store and picked up some dollar paper with little snowman dancing around a winter wonderlandscape. That night, Kevin kicked me from the room so he could wrap my presents. He then let me "shake" one of them, and to my utter and complete horror, it was wrapped in Really Pretty Paper with Really Fancy Ribbon and a Custom Bow. Let me remind you that this was only ONE of the gifts.
So, needless to say, when I met up with the friends yesterday to finish Xmas shopping, I went to the nearest craft store and bought nice paper and pretty ribbon so that I would not be shown up by--of all people--a MALE.
Long story short, the wrapping leaves much to be desired, but it does cut a pretty picture with the ribbon. Unfortunately, I just couldn't get the bow right, so I shoe-knotted it. I feel somewhat ashamed, as Kevin and I both worked at the same arts and crafts store, and somehow he managed to learn how to create a decent bow whereas I did not. Now, I just have to finish the other gifts I got him, and then stuff his stocking, and I'm done. =D Yay!
Finally, I decided to take one more adventure into the unknown, and am now regretting it. Haha. This was the most terrifying thing I've had to do all day today, and no amount of plastic forks could protect me from what I was about to face...
My credit report.
And oh noes, is it BAAAAAD. But! It is fixable! I don't have very much left at all to pay off on my student loans, and SCAD should be getting taken care of by January (I hope). There is also a little bit on there from a credit card I got a while ago, but it is much lower than I thought (well--I originally thought that it had been paid off completely, haha) and if I do really owe that much (I'm going to double check first), than I can pay it off right away. I will shed a tear over the fact that my savings account won't reach the projected "end-of-year" balance, BUT, if it means raising my credit score, than I guess it will be worth it. SIGH.
My score really wouldn't be this bad if it weren't for the things that happened which caused my parents to become terribly behind on my school payments. =( It does make me sad, because some of it was really out of my control. My parents were paying for school, like some parents do for their kids, and I was naturally under the impression that that was how it would be...but it did not turn out that way (owing to circumstances beyond their control).
What it taught me was that I just cannot depend on anyone anymore when it comes to money. Period. Hence, why I sock away $100 every week out of my weekly paycheck to a savings account that I never touch except for emergencies (the credit card would constitute as an emergency--a "saving-my-credit-score" emergency).
And that is that. It isn't ALL bad. I do have a job, and I do get really nice benefits, so I can't complain too much.
My manuscript is being fed lots of high fructose corn syrup and fats; it's a skeleton right now, and I need to beef it up a bit.
More on that later. I've written too much as it is.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Slow and steady...
I have really no idea if anyone will read this, or want to read it, for that matter. I have a feeling this blog will involve a lot of writing-angst, though I will make a concentrated effort to keep the angst at a minimum. It will not be a day-to-day account of my admittedly Not So Exciting life, but I am sure I will vent about a few things, or gloat about the newest trick Braxton (my dog--the Miniature Schnauzer) has learned, or about whatever else I think you all may find interesting.
I've created this entirely on a whim, as primarily an outlet for me to just write my thoughts, my ideas, and whatever else brain-spew I might throw up. I'm not sure where to start, exactly, so I suppose I will introduce myself:
For those who may or may not know me, I am Jennifer. I plowed my way through high school with the highest dreams of getting a wonderful artsy job, doing amazingly artsy things, making a decent living, becoming as close to famous as I could as a theater-major, and just basically being the epitome of a college success story.
And here I am...none of those things. =)
Long, angsty story short: I ended up getting my ass kicked financially, and now I am enrolled in an online certification course to become a certified Pharmacy Technician, so that I might have a steady income while I attempt to pay off some of my debt and go back to college. I am working at Bank of America so that I may fund this online-school-thing, and so that I might buy a car (did I mention I don't have one of those?) and, hopefully, move somewhere Far Far Away with my wonderful boyfriend.
Anyways...
After a few months of I-hate-my-life sentiments, self-pity, and much whining, I decided that, while I have all this free time, I might as well pursue my childhood dream of becoming a published author. Frankly, I don't care so much about becoming the next J.K. Rowling (I suck at writing fantasy, anyways)--I just want to write. I don't want to work in a pharmacy and/or banking for the rest of my days, despite how much money it will make me.
This sort of lifestyle means that I have no choice but to become published. It would be pretty kick-ass to be published, so I'm going to go ahead and see if I can't just make my living off of writing. Don't misunderstand me; I am still going to get a degree. However, I want to give this dream a shot, because it's been put on the wayside for many years now, and I feel like this is the opportune moment (thanks, Capt. Sparrow for those words of wisdom) for pursuing something I've wanted since childhood.
I fell extremely short shooting for the stars, so this time, I'm going to shoot for the treetops and make my way up from there. Slow and steady wins the race, after all.
I guess I will tell you just a little bit on my book.
I enjoy being entertaining, and I love books of all sizes and genres. In my books (or unfinished manuscripts, rather) I try to shy away from plots with ridiculously subtle political points and symbolism. I like happy, floaty things--not 'bog-you-down-in-a-lot-of-sad-depressing-stuff' things. That isn't to say my ideas are all flowers and frolicking puppies--but it does say that if you ever do read one of my future published works, you will hopefully not have to concentrate too hard on understanding it, and it shouldn't make you feel too unhappy about life and about society.
Moving on.
I write primarily historical fiction with paranormal twists. The current manuscript I am working on was intended to be Adult, but somehow it just worked better as a Young Adult. It is set in 1800's England, and the main character is a girl of about 15--strong headed and extremely rebellious against the stereotypes and norms of her time. She made herself this way--not me. I do hope that this makes her easy to relate to for my future younger (and no doubt rebellious themselves) readers. I know that nowadays the huge thing is modern-day stories with vampires and damsels in distress; therefore,I hope that this manuscript will offer a nice little Something Different. It features a female character that is anything BUT a damsel in distress. I also think it would be quite exciting to get the younger generation interested in history--especially British history, as it is so very colorful and interesting. The 1800s particularly marked a very tumultuous time period for the redcoats, their neighbors, and the Colonies. My manuscript will touch on those important events, but it will not be about them, therefore, it will not be a lecture-y, text book-y read. =)
This blog will focus mostly on my writing process and my journey, however, I will have to--for obvious reasons--keep exact details on my manuscript rather vague. The plot, for instance, is something that I will not delve in to very deeply. I will try to convey the gist of it, however. As for excerpts--I'm debating on whether or not to post a bit here and there. I most likely will post only small amounts. Sorry, but only those whom I know on a personal level will get to read the manuscript in it's entirety. =( The rest of you will just have to wait until the book comes out! Hehe.
I'll add that I'm calling this blog "Gravestone Confessions," because it correlates well with the gist of my story, and because I thought it sounded artsy. Teehee.
If you are reading this, please don't be shy and say hello! I'll need all the support, comments, suggestions, funny stories, and coffee-donations that I can get!!!
With love,
Jennifer M!
I've created this entirely on a whim, as primarily an outlet for me to just write my thoughts, my ideas, and whatever else brain-spew I might throw up. I'm not sure where to start, exactly, so I suppose I will introduce myself:
For those who may or may not know me, I am Jennifer. I plowed my way through high school with the highest dreams of getting a wonderful artsy job, doing amazingly artsy things, making a decent living, becoming as close to famous as I could as a theater-major, and just basically being the epitome of a college success story.
And here I am...none of those things. =)
Long, angsty story short: I ended up getting my ass kicked financially, and now I am enrolled in an online certification course to become a certified Pharmacy Technician, so that I might have a steady income while I attempt to pay off some of my debt and go back to college. I am working at Bank of America so that I may fund this online-school-thing, and so that I might buy a car (did I mention I don't have one of those?) and, hopefully, move somewhere Far Far Away with my wonderful boyfriend.
Anyways...
After a few months of I-hate-my-life sentiments, self-pity, and much whining, I decided that, while I have all this free time, I might as well pursue my childhood dream of becoming a published author. Frankly, I don't care so much about becoming the next J.K. Rowling (I suck at writing fantasy, anyways)--I just want to write. I don't want to work in a pharmacy and/or banking for the rest of my days, despite how much money it will make me.
This sort of lifestyle means that I have no choice but to become published. It would be pretty kick-ass to be published, so I'm going to go ahead and see if I can't just make my living off of writing. Don't misunderstand me; I am still going to get a degree. However, I want to give this dream a shot, because it's been put on the wayside for many years now, and I feel like this is the opportune moment (thanks, Capt. Sparrow for those words of wisdom) for pursuing something I've wanted since childhood.
I fell extremely short shooting for the stars, so this time, I'm going to shoot for the treetops and make my way up from there. Slow and steady wins the race, after all.
I guess I will tell you just a little bit on my book.
I enjoy being entertaining, and I love books of all sizes and genres. In my books (or unfinished manuscripts, rather) I try to shy away from plots with ridiculously subtle political points and symbolism. I like happy, floaty things--not 'bog-you-down-in-a-lot-of-sad-depressing-stuff' things. That isn't to say my ideas are all flowers and frolicking puppies--but it does say that if you ever do read one of my future published works, you will hopefully not have to concentrate too hard on understanding it, and it shouldn't make you feel too unhappy about life and about society.
Moving on.
I write primarily historical fiction with paranormal twists. The current manuscript I am working on was intended to be Adult, but somehow it just worked better as a Young Adult. It is set in 1800's England, and the main character is a girl of about 15--strong headed and extremely rebellious against the stereotypes and norms of her time. She made herself this way--not me. I do hope that this makes her easy to relate to for my future younger (and no doubt rebellious themselves) readers. I know that nowadays the huge thing is modern-day stories with vampires and damsels in distress; therefore,I hope that this manuscript will offer a nice little Something Different. It features a female character that is anything BUT a damsel in distress. I also think it would be quite exciting to get the younger generation interested in history--especially British history, as it is so very colorful and interesting. The 1800s particularly marked a very tumultuous time period for the redcoats, their neighbors, and the Colonies. My manuscript will touch on those important events, but it will not be about them, therefore, it will not be a lecture-y, text book-y read. =)
This blog will focus mostly on my writing process and my journey, however, I will have to--for obvious reasons--keep exact details on my manuscript rather vague. The plot, for instance, is something that I will not delve in to very deeply. I will try to convey the gist of it, however. As for excerpts--I'm debating on whether or not to post a bit here and there. I most likely will post only small amounts. Sorry, but only those whom I know on a personal level will get to read the manuscript in it's entirety. =( The rest of you will just have to wait until the book comes out! Hehe.
I'll add that I'm calling this blog "Gravestone Confessions," because it correlates well with the gist of my story, and because I thought it sounded artsy. Teehee.
If you are reading this, please don't be shy and say hello! I'll need all the support, comments, suggestions, funny stories, and coffee-donations that I can get!!!
With love,
Jennifer M!
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